Friday, July 11, 2014

Garry? Really??

Over the years, there have been a number of people who call me, Garry. I simply correct them. It's an honest mistake. Of that number, there are a few who insist on calling me Garry, which is not my name. And eventually, I just go along to get along because they're plain stupid.

There is historical precedent for this.

President/General Ulysses Grant's parents named him Hiram but called him by his middle name, Ulysses, or "Lyss" for short. When he entered West Point in 1839, his name was mistakenly changed to U. Simpson. He then became known as U.S. Grant, rather than H.U. Grant, which stood for the initials for his given name, Hiram Ulysses.

I'm not saying that I'm in President Grant's league. I don't smoke cigars incessantly and drink rot-gut whiskey so I'm obviously NOT Grant's reincarnation...neither do I wear a present.


WoFat said...

You probably use a better deodorant.

jenny said...

ah, now that's a perfectly distinguished beard he has going on. Maybe you need a USGrant beard. And then grow out your hair on the sides and run some styling product through it so it sticks out like that. :)

Considering I have ONLY THE MOST COMMON NAME EVER, you would think I would not have the same problem of people always getting my name wrong. You would think, in fact, that the general population would look at a female in her mid-thirties and AUTOMATICALLY ASSUME her name is Jenny. Astoundingly, though, the name game is a challenge for us all.

LL said...

Yes, I did think that every woman in her mid-30's was named Jenny. However, I didn't come out and just call them all Jenny -- but I'll try it out on women when I'm standing in line at the post office or grocery store. I shall report my findings.

As to the Grant Hair, people in that era didn't bathe much and their hair reflects that. There may be some product that mimics it, but as I suggested previously, I have a thing about hygiene, which goes to WoFat's observation.

Euripides said...

Ah! Now there's a beard to emulate - Grant's.

On the name thing, I get called a**hole a lot by my left wing admirers. I don't bother to correct them. As you say, they're just plain stupid.

LL said...

There is another solution. Change your name to Allen Hole, or something similar. You could sign your checks, A. Hole. Check into a hotel, A. Hole. Sign the guest register at weddings, A. Hole. The options are nearly endless.

Change your blog name to the A. Hole blog...vindicate all of those progressive detractors.

LL said...

Not a scientific poll.

I have spoken to three women in line (randomly). All were in their mid-30's. I called each of them "Jenny" and struck up a conversation that went sort of along these lines"

"Hey, Jenny! I haven't seen you in ages."

I'd never seen each of the three potential Jennys before. Only one of the three turned out to be actually named "Jenny".

jenny said...

ah hah!
You need more data. I'm certain the figure will be higher. But don't get yourself arrested, Garry. You never know when you might be infringing upon a liberated woman's right to not be called by the wrong name on accident.

You should probably morph it into a more subtle club game. You sit at the bar with a handwritten note (or three) prepared in advance. Wait til you see a 30-something come in that you want to have next to you. Watch what she orders, then when it's time, have a second one sent to her with a note that says "Hey, I think I've seen you in here before. Isn't your name Jenny? Pretty sure you're a cab [or whatever drink] fan... hope you enjoy this. If you want company, I'm at the corner of the bar." (She will either feel stalked [20%] or extremely noticed. This man knows my name?!? And what I drink?! Who is this Extremely Wise Fellow who clearly pays attention to the right things in life?!)

Let me know how it goes.

LL said...

That's not scientific, because everyone knows that every woman in the 30-40 age range who comes to a bar is named "Jenny".

I thought that the post office and grocery store would be more scientific.

Race Bannon said...


I have wondered why you don't go by BL?

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