In what some progressives are calling a bold and unprecedented move, President Barack Obama responded harshly to the Russian invasion of sovereign Ukrainian territory when they crossed the frontier with special forces and paratroops and at the same time, landed two divisions of Naval Infantry at Sevastopol.
From now on, joining with First Lady Michelle's effort to stop people from eating food that she doesn't like - Russian Dressing will be removed from the shelves of markets all across in America.
Press Secretary Jay Carney emphasized the administration's move. "We wanted to send a tough, unambiguous message to the world."
Russian President Putin is reportedly torn between his interest in annexing the Crimea and Eastern Ukraine and his interest in giving Americans access to Russian dressing for their salad. It may be propaganda, but Russian Ambassador Dmitry Kissoff suggested that Michelle Obama secretly uses Russian dressing on her salad - how else would the mere shadow cast by her ample rear weigh 50 lbs?