Monday, December 31, 2012

Bad Dye Job

White Hair - Achieved through the use of smoke and mirrors.
The .50 Cal. Desert Eagle isn't real. I'm merely posing.
Firearms are dangerous. They kill Hippies. 
Darlin' suggested that I share more about myself in my blog about a week ago. Since it's New Year's Eve (Hogmanay in Scotland), I decided to purge myself of this hidden information about myself to all of you who read this blog. 

My hair is not white. It's black as a raven's wing. I dye it white to appear older and more seasoned (which is a euphemism for rotting). Many people used to tell me, "Oh, you're rotten!" Taking that to heart, I decided to keep my hair white all of the time and to conceal my dark hair roots through a non-patented (but infinitely clever) process that I'm not going to share.

Also, I'm sharing some other information about other bloggers. I'm dragging all of you out of the closet!
  • Frequent Poster - WoFat: That is NOT his real given name. Many people use it, but it's not the name that he was born with. 
  • Frequent Poster - Opus #6: That's not her real name either. I don't know her real name, but I know that she communicates with Donald Trump. Suspicious but true.
  • Frequent Poster - Race Bannon: That's not his real name either. Once would think from his screen name that he's a racist but he's not.
  • Frequent Poster - Azra: Not an alias, which makes her appearance here on the blog very suspicious. 
  • Frequent Poster - Darlin: One of the more dangerous people here because she is a chef - and shows photos of her baked goods (no, not her muffins - get your mind out of the gutter) without actually sharing them.
  • Frequent Poster - Coffeypot: Even more dangerous than Darlin. He's a Navy veteran and old sailors never die -- they just get a little 'dinghy'...
  • Frequent Poster - Euripides: Yes, it's not an alias. And old Tanners never die, they just go into hiding.
  • Frequent Lurker - Anonymous from Reno. Gambling advice: Never do amazing card tricks with the people you play poker with


Opus #6 said...

White is black and black is white. Momma warned me about this obamanation.

WoFat said...

Why would you want to smoke mirrors?

darlin said...

WHAT? Opus and WoFat aren't for real? LL are these two figments of your white hair imagination? I've also told you LL that anytime you're headed this way a simple heads up and you're in for muffins, and no not THAT kind of muffin! lol

Opus do you really talk to Donald?

WoFat what is your real name, or do you not tell? My real name is almost darlin... just don't ask my ex husbands about this though k?

Wishing you all a blessed and Happy New Year!

WoFat said...

WoFat is the latest in a line of monikers, changing over the years with goals and circumstance. The real name is known by some - others not.

LL said...

Darlin - WoFat is an International Man of Mystery whose mojo is powerful enough to change the orbits of the planets.

WoFat - I didn't tell them that you could change the course of mighty rivers and bend steel in your bare hands. You can discuss all that if you wish.

WoFat said...

I tried bending steel with my bare hands, but a broke a nail.

Opus #6 said...

Darlin, The Donald replied to my Christmas Wishes with a Happy New Year on Twitter. That's all.

LL said...

WoFat - Who are you kidding? You can leap small buildings with a single bound. Bending steel is nothing to you.

Opus #6 - So you say...We know of The Donald's love for pretty blondes.

Azra said...

Strange that the last comment appears Anonymous on my side. Azra

LL said...

Azra - Ghost in the machine?

Azra said...

Perhaps. I commented that I find it hilarious that I'm "dangerous" because I'm real. And that I always knew you were a raven head ;P
And then it disappeared into bloggerville.

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